There are many things in life that bring us happiness. It can be experiences, it can be people, or can be peaceful solitude. The thing is finding your happy. Finding people who make you happy is a wonderful thing.
It can be simple, it can be complex. It can be complex to some, yet simple to you. It doesn’t matter. All that truly matters is the fact that it makes you smile.
Nothing that makes us smile is to be scared of, to be ashamed of, to be ignored. No-one that brings a smile should ever be forgotten - or ever will be forgotten, and that has made me think about loss this week. As we get older we inevitably suffer loss in our lives, I suppose it’s the natural process of life, but harder to take when sudden or that loss has been in the most tragic of circumstances.
Luckily for most of us as a child we are shielded from it. At most it will be the loss of a family pet, and then ultimately grandparents and older relatives. But for some it can come crashing in with no explanation and no expectation. That is tough to process, not just as an adult but as a child. There’s no guide book, there’s no ‘one type fits all’. It is a very individual and personal process. Don’t let anyone try and tell you that what you’re doing is wrong.
Then we go to being a ‘grown up’ and what it means to lose people we are close to. I’m not talking about older relatives, and worse still younger. But friends that pass. I’ve lost very dear friends to illness and it plain and simply sucks. I think if we all take stock for just a moment we all have a range of ages within our friendship and peerage groups. Can be anything from 1 to 100, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that connection.
Losing someone at 100 isn’t any less painful, even though we subconsciously know they are closer to the end of their journey than someone our own age or younger. The thing is, they can still be young at heart and young of mind, and whilst they can regale you with a lifetime of stories and adventures, then they will live on forever more through your memory.
So if and when you are in the position where you have to deal with loss, I have worked out two simple things that has helped me to process it. It might help, it may not, but it hopefully will make it easier to process
I am thankful you were here in my life, no matter who long or short you walked beside me. And lastly, the one that makes it easier on the tough days:
You’re not gone, you never will be; you’re just not here...
Happy Damn Friday Peeps! x
I'd love to hear from you - you can reach me on:
@happydamnfriday on Twitter
happydamnfriday@outlook.com
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